07 August 2017

How To Use Empathy To Eradicate Social Anxiety, Depression And Disconnection.

 

Our society has been created in a way that creates disconnect between human beings, at a time when there has never been more of us on planet earth. 

How is it that many of us our living in cities surrounded by millions of people, yet we struggle to interact in a loving and connected way with any of those human beings? How is that we do not authentically share who we are with other humans when we all share the same human mind with all it’s fears, insecurities, wants and needs, excitement and joy, and of course our want to love, and be loved. 

We may all look different, but we are all connected as one, we have forgotten this, lost in our own thoughts of self. 

Many of us feel disconnected in our lives, lost in our self, we overthink and look at the world with a “why me” attitude to life, thinking it is all about ourselves, feeling alone, and lonely in a world of abundance.

We make decisions and choices depending on how we feel each day and because of that, the planet often suffers, in fact we suffer. Every single choice each human being decides to make is in fact, contrary to many peoples belief a BIG deal. 

Imagine if every time we interacted with a new person we felt a sense that we had always known them. What if each time we attended a social event or had people over for dinner we actually felt what everyone at that table or event was feeling? What would change if we were able to tune into another’s life, not lost in our own thoughts and self-importance but instead able to be have empathy with another human being. Not just human beings, other animals too, and not just other animals , but all of nature. 

Empathy is everything.

The idea behind this article is to help others with social anxiety, overthinking and an inability to be authentic and connect on a deep level with others, but in a sense this article is about so much more. It’s about how not only can we live without anxiety, disconnect, dishonesty and depression, but how we, with our small everyday actions, decisions, and choices, can in fact make a HUGE difference in the world through the domino effect of our loving another human being.

Many of us have all heard at one time or another that we are all connected, it is becoming more and more known that everything on this planet is intrinsically connected, but to embody this knowledge is a whole new ball game. 

How do we embody this connection when so many people are disconnected? How do we care, and feel for another when we have so much to sort out for ourselves? Our needs, our desires, our own lives to figure out! 

Connection is a choice. 

It all begins with a choice, and that choice is ours to make. How do we want to show up with our short time on this planet? I’d love to tell you that you are of great significance, and I will, you are. But only for a short time, and then you will be gone, no longer apart of this world in the way you are now, we get one life to make a difference, one life to touch others lives, one life to connect deeply and love with all we have. 

I made a decision when I was younger after spending so many years holding myself back, feeling disconnected, inauthentic, and not able to connect deeply with others, because of fear of what could be. I no longer wanted to live this way. I knew I was capable of so much more, because I had seen others that way, able to love deeply, connect effortlessly, feel another’s heart, be kind hearted to all, and live deeply present in this day. 

I made a decision that I would work hard to embody love, and connection after realising that all I ever wanted was to love and be loved, all I wanted was to feel completely free to be myself, and be authentic to the core. 

What happened when I realised I wanted to love and be kind to others whilst authentically expressing who I am is that I began to have empathy for others. I began "coming out of myself and into anothers heart", I began to listen more deeply, not just with my ears but with my presence in the moment, I listened from my heart. 

With empathy, I realised we as a collective humanity aren’t so different from each other after all, I realised that when one person was feeling something, I could feel it too. I realised that through energetic exchange we could connect far deeper than words could ever explain. Not only that, but if energy and feeling is what really connected us as humans, then it must be the same for the rest of the natural world too, my connection to animals deepened, my connection to nature deepened. 

I could suddenly feel the truth of how we are all intertwined as one, the only thing stopping me feeling this was the thoughts that I decided to think. 

Here are 3 simple ways to embody empathy in our lives, so we feel more loving, and are able to interact in a fearless, kind and authentic way: 

Listening: 

This is such a simple thing, but monumental in our ability to connect. When we listen deeply and I mean really deeply, as in the other person is all that matters in that moment, something miraculous happens. We stop thinking so much, and when we stop thinking so much, we begin to feel. We begin to feel empathy for anothers life. 

Listening deeply simply requires us to focus on the other person as they speak and the energy they are giving off whilst in our presence. Its simple, but maybe not so easy for many people that struggle to listen without judging, giving advice, or waiting for their turn to say something that they can’t wait to say. 

Can you listen deeply, in this moment, for just this moment? 

Be Authentic:

Being authentic in a world that often hides so much is a courageous act, but is the most freeing and connecting experience we could possibly imagine. What happens when we are authentic  is that we begin allowing others to be the same way, when we share our human nature we give others permission to do the same. Sometimes it will happen that for the first time in someones whole life, they get to talk to someone who isn’t afraid to be vulnerable. We do NOT need to feel confident to be authentic, all we need is the courage to be ourselves, no matter what we are feeling inside. 

Begin to FEEL into the choices we make: 

Each one of us makes choices each day that effects our own lives and whether we realise it or not, those choices effect other lives around us, including nature. 

So instead of making mindless choices, we could in fact be more mindful, this means when we eat food, can we feel into what effect that choice is making? When we are feeling in a low mood and we aren’t loving to those around us because we think we aren’t getting enough in our lives, can we feel into the effect that choice is having? 

Can we be mindful of our actions in town’s and cities each day? Staring at the ground, how many people miss out on a chance to see you smile and feel that energy?

When we don’t follow our mission in life and instead procrastinate, can we feel the effect that not giving our own unique value to the world is having? 

Feeling into actions, is different from taking actions from feeling, when we take action from feeling we often make choices that don’t serve ourselves or the world around us. 

When we feel the actions we are taking, we have empathy for others around us.  

The call for empaths: 

There is demand in the world right now, for us to step up as human beings who are willing to embody empathy, and love in our lives. Through loving empathy, not only each of our own lives benefit through less depression, less anxiety, and more freedom and love, but the whole planet benefits through the domino effect of our every day thoughts and actions. 

With a willingness to make different choices in our own lives, we can realise that what we do does make a difference, each and every one of us makes a difference with our time on this planet. 

 

About the Author: 

My name is George Howard, my life’s mission is to be relentlessly ME, to BE alive and to liberate others wherever I go so they can do the same.

I believe wholeheartedly that the freedom to be ourselves is vital to living a fulfilled life, to be authentic, to be the real us, to not hide away, to be vulnerable and accept ourselves completely. 

The coaching and writing I create allows my inspiring clients and readers to come alive in their own lives. 

Learn more about me here.